"Wives Submit" What It Really Means

TRANSCRIPT

So this series you'll be glad you did. It's been so practical. It's been so helpful to people and it's where we're trying to learn that we got to make good decisions because if you make good decisions, you reap the benefits. If you make bad decisions that lead to bad habits, you also reap the benefits or the consequences of it.

And so we're trying to flip it. So we get away from having to say, Oh man, I wish I had to, I'm glad I did. You know, we want to try and flip this script around and I kicked it off. And I did this jigsaw puzzle thing, which I think you get to have a look at here is that I wanted us to understand all of life is connected.

When you really understand what God is all about, and everything is all about, you kind of existed before you got here, and you'll exist after here. And everything in between, it's all connected. So every decision that you make, every choice that you make, is affecting the next season of your life. So if you make good ones, well, you're going to get a better season coming up.

If you don't, it's not going to be so great. And families, parents, you know this, you're trying to help your kid understand this all the time so they have a better future. And, and pastors, we're trying to do it as well because we want to make sure that you continue in your relationship with Christ and finish your race to the end.

But for parents, it's, it's extra strong because we're always saying, friends, our friends determine the direction, the direction of our life and the quality of it. So you've got to pick carefully. I often get to talk to young adults and things like that, or people that are single again and that kind of thing.

And I just say, be very, very careful who you pick for friends because they will shape your life. I had some great friends when I was in school, but every time I got together and I ended up in trouble. Because they would do things that I didn't know that they were doing, but I was there and the next thing I know the police would show up and I'm thinking, what's going on?

Well, you're here with the rest of them. And I go, thanks. And then what happened is they were faster than me. They all ran away. And I'm just stood there going, I don't know. I'm just steering ze boat. I don't know. I'm just here. I don't know. But this is what happens. So you've got to pick your friends. And I try and tell, tell people bad relationships, bad relationships have about a two year lifespan.

That's about it. That's all you get out of it. So you're thinking about going to something. If it's bad, if it's unhealthy, you've got about two years. Then it'll bust up. But if you're not careful, you'll be carrying the scars of it for the rest of your life. The other side of the coin is if you have great relationships, if you have healthy relationships, they can last a lifetime.

The relationships around here, we'll be in relationships in Christ. That we're asking God to use us to help impact our city and some of us will walk together our entire lives in this relationship, serving and loving God and loving others. And then one day maybe Jesus will come back in our lifetime if you do.

Yahoo! We all change together. If not, when our race is over, one of us will depart but we'll be reunited again it says at a later stage. It's all connected. And so what this is about, it's not about rules. It's not about rules because there are laws. We all know there's laws. There's a law of gravity. Chris found out when he's a young fella and thought he'd leap off the shed like Superman and went straight down his face plant.

There is a law of gravity. So there are laws. There are certain things that are happening. But what we're talking about is what's in between the laws and in between the rules, which is wisdom. It's about wisdom and our definition of wisdom is this insights informed by the knowledge that life is all connected.

Once you get this, you understand it's all connected. This is so interesting. I hope many of you are doing your soap devotions. We're reading together because we're writing the book of Proverbs now. I didn't plan that. But that's a book all about wisdom. This is what it's all about. So we've looked at the fact that it's all connected.

We've looked at, we've got to listen well, we've got to look to forgiveness. But now I really want to turn up the heat on something and deal with something that is so misunderstood that it's not funny. Have you ever had a relationship that's been going so well? It's really been a great relationship.

Suddenly they say something or they do something and then you're not so sure about them. A little bit of distrust comes in and then because you're creative, your overactive imagination kicks in and you start to question their motives about everything. Something's not right and then you start to distance yourself and you drift apart.

What person are you thinking about right now? What person are you thinking of? Maybe it was a parent that should have been loving you and helping you and growing you and helping you connect with God, but just was not there. Maybe it was a friend who betrayed you at school or uni or something like that.

You know, like, who are you thinking about now? That used to be good, but it ain't not so good anymore. Maybe it was a work associate. They got really close to you because they wanted to be your friend, but they really wanted to use you to climb the corporate ladder and you kind of got squashed down the way.

Maybe it was a Christian. Who claimed to be a Christian but was kind of hypocritical, didn't really live like that. But here's the worst one. You know what some of you are thinking right now? Man, you just described my marriage. That's what we're like now. We used to be so close. Now we don't even talk. It's like we're suspicious about everyone.

Well, I want you to hang in there. We dealt with forgiveness last week and we know we all got to do that, but if we get this next section right, you can actually head off at the pass some relational disasters. So my hope is out of this and my prayer is out of this that you'll begin to recognize relational blur when you see it.

Relational blur. That's when things are not going so well. Now, in order to get to this, I'm going to have to delve into some of the teachings of Jesus as outworked by the Apostles and I do need to tell you that what I'm going to share with you, angels fear to tread in this space. They are terrified. But I need to delve into the topic of marriage for a little bit.

But don't switch off because some of you are younger and you want to be married. Some of you are married. You'll benefit by this. Some of you used to be married, but now you're not married. And you really want to be married again and that you'll benefit. Some of you are married and wish the heck you weren't married.

And this might help you as well. It's, this is really about relationships, but I need to delve into this context of marriage, but just talking about marriage, I don't really understand a lot of things in there. Like. I don't understand why my wife sends me funny memes and I don't know what I'm supposed to learn about it.

She sent me this one here. It says, before I got married I just smashed into the back of cars because I didn't have a wife to gasp and scream when someone break three miles ahead. I don't, is she, is she sending me a message? Is this something I'm supposed to do? She sent, she sent me one the other day. It was too small for me to put up and it said this.

It was Husband, wife, husband, wife. Husband says, what's for dinner? Wife says, nothing. Husband says, we had that last night. Wife says, I made enough for two nights. I don't know what I'm supposed to do with it. I think she sends me these signals like, I'm on to you buddy. And then she sent me this one. This is the classic.

Have a look at this.

He wants to play golf.

Hey babe this is Blake. He just called and he's asked me if I can play golf with him. I thought you were up to something. Oh, you mean right now? Yeah. Okay, bye. Cool, see ya.

There's dynamics in relationships that you don't know. And I don't know why I get sent these, but I get them on a regular basis. So I guess I got a little bit of work. So what I need to do is I need to just address Jesus teaching about this and get to a principle that will help us get rid of the blur.

Now, the apostle Paul was talking to a group of people and he's, picking a principle of Jesus and he's outworking it and he is let's just say he's really going out there. And so I'm gonna, he pulls out a gem of a verse which I'm gonna share now in a few minutes, but this is a verse that you will never see, I'm telling you right now, you will never see this verse on a makeup mirror anywhere.

You'll never see it, but I do need to tell you that you, you kind of need to kind of need to brace for impact. This is the captain brace for impact. Okay, so you're good. Hold your breath. Here comes the verse, put it up. Wives submit to your husbands as you do to the Lord. Isn't that, what, hey! Some of you ladies are going, gee I'm glad I came here today.

Now before you just, don't run out, don't run out, don't run out, this has been the most misinterpreted, misunderstood verse. But I know, can you imagine if Paul was speaking today, if he was speaking today and he dropped that little verse out in government or something like that, they'd be going, Paul, are you out of your Vulcan mind?

Do you have any idea what's going around here? This is the most stupid advice I have ever heard. Do you know what's happening, that's happening to women? This is ridiculous. How did this nonsense even get its way into the Bible? That's how they'd be going at him. And that would be a good, valid question to ask.

But here's the deal. It's actually great advice. If it's in context. Context is everything. What is the context of what's going on? You always got to put the text in the context. We take things out of context, it's not good. It's like if I said, you know, like, I like cooking. I like my kids. And I like my pets.

That's in context. If I say, I like cooking my family and my pets, I'm a psycho. See, so context is really, really important. So before I unpack this, and please stay with me, stay with me here, and it's not about marriage, it's actually beyond that, I do need to just say, guys, I understand how hard this is for you, because as guys, we don't want another guy telling us how to do relational advice.

We want our spouses to think that we came up with all the great ideas. So we don't want, we don't need some other guy doing that. But the problem is, your wife is thinking this. You desperately need someone to tell you what to do. Actually, the person that you need to tell you what to do, you don't need another guy.

You just need to listen to me. That's what the wife is thinking. And you know all those great ideas you think you have? I let you have them. I just gave them to you. So I know the dynamic that goes on in relationships around this piece. But,

The principle behind what Jesus is getting at and what Paul is getting at here is very, very good advice and it's this. Mutual submission. That's what this is about and it's powerful. Mutual submission is powerful because it creates trust and cooperation. It diminishes suspicion. Gets rid, it promotes transparency, gets rid of pride, brings about humility.

And that's always a mutual thing. It's, it's always really beneficial. Now, but this portion of scripture that I put out where angels feed a tread, you know, the old wives submit to husbands, that kind of thing. That is the most misunderstood, misused and twisted piece of scripture in church leaders that there's ever been.

It's not what it says. That one there, wives submit to your husband, has been used by, misapplied by Christian men to dominate wives. It's been mischaracterized now by non Christians to, to actually dismiss Christianity as some misogynistic ideology that disempowers women. But the reality is Christianity is the exact opposite.

Jesus is the exact opposite. He actually introduced the equality, equal rights of men and women. He did that and he did it when he said to them, to the men, you know your God is her God as well. He leveled the playing field. Nobody thought like this in the first century when Jesus was speaking. Nobody thought this when he dropped this little jam out.

They all thought what everybody had thought. Male first, female second. That was the culture of the day in the first century. But his followers, Jesus followers, man they were, it was unprecedented the amount that they actually gave to women to create this equal living, level playing field. So this verse here is actually in the middle of a portion of verse, it's called a passage, and this passage that he starts it with, it's unbelievable, empowering, and empowering women, and helping us understand what this is really all about.

It's a statement that was introduced to the ancient world, to the unthinkable, To the unthinkable, culturally disrupted and way ahead of its time, scandalizing. Way ahead of it, scandalous. Keep going. Dignifying. Keep going. Alright, that's it. Concept of mutual submission. This was the concept he was introducing.

Now, let me show you the verse that is before the one that causes the big reaction everywhere. Here it is. Submit to one another out of reverence to Christ. That's right before this. Submit to one another out of reverence to Christ. Which is why I say, this is not just about a marriage thing. This is beyond that.

This is where it was started was before. It's just being outworked in that space. Which means, put each other first, regardless of what's going on. Think about each other, be considerate of each other. And out of that, after he dropped that gem, which is the one, submit to one another, then he's talking to Mary Coppice, he says, so wives, submit to your husbands, as unto the Lord.

Now, the Greeks, they're just weird. I'm going to tell you right now, Greeks, and they go to the Greek language, it's just weird. Because that word, submit, for this one does not actually exist in the original text. But the thing doesn't make any sense. If you go back and look at the original, it goes, Wives, unto your husbands as unto the Lord.

Well, what does that mean? Unto what? What am I supposed to do? I don't know what I'm supposed to do. So they borrowed the verb from the verse prior to help them understand it. Wives, submit to your husbands as unto the Lord. Mutual submission. But he didn't stop there. So verse 21 is the key verb, and I don't know why the Greeks do this, but they introduce the verb in the ancient Greek and then they leave it out for the rest of the portion of the thought until the next thing where they want to action to it and then they insert the verb again and then they go again.

So this one is a verb before this is the context of the whole thing. Submit to one another as unto the Lord. Now you'll notice it doesn't say women submit to men. Doesn't say that at all. It says wives submit to your husbands. Why? In the context of relationship. Because you want a relationship that's going to go the distance.

So the big thing here is submit to one another out of reverence to Christ. And then he goes on a bit further in that word love. You could have put the same word submit. Husbands love your wives. Just as Christ loved the church. Love your wives. They're saying, guys, you submit to your wives too. You love them out of reverence for Christ, the way that I've loved you.

Well, how much? Well a lot. Jesus died for the church. . See, it's the mutual submission. So Jesus is introducing a concept here, which is so powerful for every relationship. He's doing it through the filter of marriage here, Paul's doing it now 'cause that's what he's dealing with at the time, and that's the need to defer to one another, defer to one another, be considerate of one another when a relationship starts to blur, defer.

Defer. Think more about them than you think about yourself. Really what this concept, this concept that's being outworked here through this is really about a submission competition. This is what it should be, a submission competition. Where both are mutually serving and submitting to each other out of reverence for Christ.

That's what the whole thing's about. Now we get this, when someone more famous than you comes in and you see someone famous, you automatically defer, don't you? You're just going to sit back and just watch and just defer to them. It's the same thing that happens any time I come into the junction. People just defer, some bow, I don't, I, I play, I digress.

No, not at all. But what I'm saying is that happens. Like if, I could be talking right here, but if Chris Hemsworth walks in, I'd be like, I can say what I like, you're not listening to me, you're over there. Well, you're deferring. That's, that's kind of what we do. But wasn't that the posture that you had when you were in pursuit of your spouse?

Or trying to win that heart, wasn't it? You know how to do this, you've already done it. What I'm saying is, and what Paul's saying is, and what Jesus is saying is, mutual submission out of reverence for Christ keeps you doing it. Why is it we kind of like do it at the start and then kind of forget about it?

It's like, what's going on there? Just keep doing it. Mutual submission unto each other out of reverence for Christ. Treat people like they're the most important people in the world. That was great what you shared. Same thing. I, I know I saw the, I saw the tension that you had at the start when suddenly it's like, Oh my goodness, this is going to go for an hour or two.

but you quickly submitted what was your agenda to help that couple that were in distress. You're never more like Christ than when you do that. And there's rewards for that. You do it out of reverence to Christ. Now one thing it doesn't say, and if you happen to be journeying with us and maybe you haven't made the decision to follow Christ, I'd say just try that anyway.

Doesn't matter what relationship it is. Mutual submission, deferring to the other person's needs to try and help understand and then I do it out of reverence to Christ and just see what happens because it works in any relationship. Now for those of us that are Christians, let's have a look in here.

Submit to one another out of reverence to one another. Is that what he said? Nope. You don't do it out of reverence to one another, because once you go into reverence of each other, you've got kind of an idolatry thing going on, but also you'll decide whether they feel like they're worthy of it or not worthy of it.

It's conditional. But when it's out of reverence for Christ, it's always the right response. Defer. He's actually, Paul's actually taken the law of Christ, Submit to one another out of reverence? And he just happens to be drilling down on it because he's got some married people in front of him with some issues.

She's just reminding him, but it's the same thing, he's just reminding him. Wives submit to your husbands as reverence to Christ. Husbands, you submit to your wives and love them the way that Christ loved the church. It's been so misunderstood and so, so distorted. He talks about it again in the book of Philippians when he's dealing with the church at Philippi.

He says,

See, we don't take our relational cues from each other. That gets conditional, and then that's not so good. We take our relational cues from Jesus. How has Jesus treated us? How has the Father treated us through Christ Jesus? And it goes on, it says whoever, who Jesus, who being in the very nature of God, did not consider equality with God something to use for his own advantage.

In other words, he didn't play the God card. He could have played his God card anytime and got out of the mess, but he didn't. He deferred to us. He submitted actually to us, out of reverence for the Father. He knew we're lost. We've lost our relationship with God. We're broken. We're trapped in sin, we're trapped in death, we can't fix it.

He can get out of it if he wants to, but he defers. It's that mutual submission. It says rather he made himself nothing. Jesus made himself nothing taking on the nature of a servant. Why is he doing that? He's doing that because God loves you. He's the creator of the heavens and the earth. He doesn't need to go to the cross for him.

We're the ones that are lost. We're the ones that chose it was not a good idea to hang out with God and broke the relationship. And God's doing everything within his means to get back and win the hearts back and say, I'm here. I do love you. I care for you. Watch this for a display of love. And Jesus goes to the cross, defers, mutually submits to us at a reverence for the father and achieve salvation.

sort out of it, whosoever wants to can come and have a relationship with a holy God again. It's amazing. So Christian marriage or a Christian relationship is two people submitted to God, deferring to one another. Submitting to God, but deferring to one another, looking out for each other. This is amazing.

But I do need to say something to you now, because I, and this is something I've noticed across the body of Christ. You have to be very careful with the word Christian. A lot of people will say they are a Christian and may not necessarily be one. Like, I've seen guys running around and they've got their Broncos jersey on, they're about 40 kilos overweight, and they go, I'm a Bronco, I got my Bronco jersey on and I'm a fan of the Broncos.

Because you look at them and go, but you definitely are not a Bronco. I'm telling you, mate, you are not playing in any team. It's the same things happened. Same things happen through society. People go, Oh, I'm a Christian. Really? Yeah, I got my jersey and everything. I'm a big fan of the church, particularly because it's a great influencer group.

I'm a big fan. Yeah, but are you living like a Christian? So for you young ones or people that are, you're pursuing other relationships, whether it's business or whether it's marriage or whatever, don't get tricked by the term Christian. Has a lot of meanings out there, but I've got the jersey, I'm a fan of the club, but I'm actually not a, you have to find a Jesus follower.

Because a Jesus follower is gonna work in mutual submission with you out of reverence for Christ. That's what creates longevity in a relationship. That's what makes it go. So if you, if you're dating this guy, cause he's a cute guy and it's all wonderful. Oh, this is great. But he treats his parents like rubbish.

He's got no time for anybody. You've got someone that's got the Christian jersey on. He's a bit of a fan, but he's not a follower. And you guys, I know, cute girl, really nice, hot looking girl. But man, if every photo is about me and my puppies trying to get out of the sack. I'm being practical here. If everything's about her and there's nothing about anybody else, she's got the jersey on and she's a bit of a fan.

But you know what? She's not really You need to find a follower of Jesus. You need to find a follower. You've got to find someone genuine. And I had, I'm, I'm, I'm, I made it funny because it is funny. But but I also want to get the point across. Don't fall for that trap when someone says, Oh, I'm a Christian.

I've been in, I've been in situations where I'm having deep conversations with someone at a party and none of them are Christians. And I'm trying to share my faith in Christ and we're having a great time. And then someone discovers I am a Christian. And it's the guy that's drunk as a skunk, swearing like mad, hitting on the woman, going, I'm a Christian too, I go to church.

And I'm going, just go away. This is not a witness for Christ. You might have a jersey, only a bit of a fan, but you're not a follower. So you've got to get to that follower because that's what it is. For relational blur when it happens, you can learn to defer. Unless someone is a follower of Jesus, that won't happen.

It won't happen. So you've got to learn to do that. You know what, pursuing each other and honoring each other, and I said not just about marriage and that, and, and humbling yourself and that is such a powerful thing. It's what causes relationships to go the distance. I saw this thing at an exponential conference recently.

I can't remember the full context. Excuse me if I get it wrong. I think her name was Flanagan. She was a runner. She, she ran the Boston marathon or something like that. Anyway, she'd been running her entire life and she had a running partner that was slightly older than you and they would run together and they did this kind of thing.

And she's desperately wanted to win this. particular event. So she gets there, but she's like miles ahead. And then her friends slowly catching up, but she's just not going to make it. But somewhere in there, something happened in her. And then she kind of slowed down for her friend to catch up. And then they, they ran for this race that she desperately wants to win, got close to the end and it's reported.

She said, this one's yours. And she hung back and she let her win mutual submission. out of respect,

reverence of God. It's huge. It's huge. And it's actually, it's actually the cure for selfishness, our personal selfishness, which it can all be. And it's like kryptonite selfishness. It repels people. Sometimes people say to me, are you okay? And I don't know, I must have a worried look on my face or something, I don't know.

They said, are you okay? You're the senior pastor. I said, yeah, yeah, yeah, but, but you're cleaning. Don't you clean? No, cleaning. Yes, and you're making some food and you're moving chairs and, and everyone seems to like want a piece of you. And you're all going, I said, he said, are you, are you okay? I said, I'm fine.

I'm just a servant. I'm just a servant. And so just like Ruthie would do, she would have seen me and Dana too across the time. We just mutually just submit to one another out of love for one another, out of reverence for Christ. Now, I'm going to give you a practical question here so you can get this right.

To see how you're going with the whole mutual submission before Christ. It's a very powerful question and that's this. When you think things are not working out. little bit not right. Try doing this. Ask this question. What can I do to help? Which is a much better question than the one that I used to use, which is, what's the matter with you?

Nothing. What's the matter with you? Nothing. What's the matter with you? Are we all right then? Yeah. There's nothing right about that. We're not right at all, but it's a much better question to go, Hey, what can I do to help? How can I lend you my strength? How could I, how could I defer to you? How could I put you first?

We've started doing this, even in our stuff, like two or three times a week, we called a lunchtime check in and say, what's the big rocks, what are you working on? And then we just go, Hey, what can we do? How can we help you win at that? It's that mutual submission. Hey, you're putting people first. It's easier.

Now I get why we don't ask this question because to ask that question, you got to deny self. And the other reason why we don't like that question is we know they'll have an answer. They're going to have an answer. And you know what happens after that? You will be forced to say no to you and say yes to them.

At which point in time you'll never be more like Christ when you have sacrificed yourself for the sake of the relationship out of reverence to Christ. You know, I still get this wrong. Believe it or not, I know, it just happens. I get this wrong I'm so passionate about the dream that God has for the junction and the dream that God has for us as a church.

And he keeps whispering to me, he said, you need one of these junction points in every suburb, a place where people can come and it's run by urban missionaries. They can make disciples and make disciples and where they can belong with, you know, like a church for the unchurch, where they can belong, where they work at what they believe.

And if they don't believe what you believe, you're going to love them anyway. And so I get really excited about that because. If you go back onto our website and look at something called the Church IC, it's starting to happen. It says, as you get these things right, the church will begin to spread like a wildfire and there is stuff going on everywhere.

And we're going, Oh, we're kind of like scrambling to keep up. So I get really passionate about it. And, and because I'm so busy in here, sometimes I have to do a lot of things I would normally do in here at home later. So I pick the moments after the kid's gone to bed and after everything's kind of settled.

Anyway, I was just Last night I had to quickly apologize to Ann because I'm gonna share this and she didn't know about it. It was about two weeks ago and we were just laying in bed and I was just doing my work and that, she's drifting off to sleep and I'm kind of thinking about all the stuff and I'm got all this going on, what are we gonna do with that?

And just listening to the Holy Spirit and then she leans across to me and she just says, I just want to be seen. It was like, oh, I just My first reaction was, what do you mean you just want to be seen? I'm not a stupid thief. Of course you're seen. No, she said, I just want to be seen. And then she rolled over and went to sleep.

Let's just say I didn't get much sleep that night because I suddenly realized that amongst here, she was getting a little bit lost and the relationship was beginning to blur. And so I was faced with that very thing. That night I was asking the Lord, what do I do to help? How do I help? How do I help carry that burden?

How do I give her my strength? How do I get this back into a place where I'm not damaging the relationship? And he just says, just mutual submission. Just love her. Put her first. Find out what's going on in her. And lend her your strength and that. And so I hadn't even shared that with her and she doesn't, when I just shared it to her, I said, honey, I got to tell you, I'm going to do this thing now.

She said, I don't even remember saying it, but it was something that just suddenly hit me. Submit to one another out of reverence. See, we're Jesus followers. We're not one another followers. We don't take our cues from each other. It doesn't matter what we do. Amen. Our, our heart should always be to love Jesus and to mutual submission and say, okay, what do I need to do?

How do I help you in this particular thing? I think, and it's amazing. The better we get at this, the better everything gets. Can you imagine if, if, if everybody understood this in the workplace and that to defer to one another out of reverence to God, man, business was, would be feel so differently. It was filled with character, integrity apart instead of what we currently have in a lot of spaces.

Marriages, they'd actually last a lifetime. You know, divorce rates would go down and kids wouldn't grow up feeling, I don't know some of you because you've talked about the feeling, well I think I'm the reason why my parents split and the reason they gave you was, hey listen, it'll be better off for the kids if we're not together, which I got to tell you is a load of, well it doesn't matter.

Don't get me on that one. But you know what I mean? Mutual submission, you start putting each other first on this, love on each other as reverence to Christ, everything changes. Everything changes. And you'll be glad that you did. And your kids will be glad you did. And the place that you work will be glad you did.

Everyone will be glad you did. Because you'll be representing Christ accurately. Jesus said, you only got one rule now. I busted it down to two for part of the way. Now it's only one. Love one another the way that I have loved you. And when you get that, You get to where Ruthie was What does love require?

These people are in need. I have an agenda, but I've got to put my side for them. Isn't that what Jesus did for us? Know what he did. He set aside his whole agenda whatever he was down for the next thing and says, you know what? I'll come to earth. I'll go through the whole process I'll help them get out of this.

I'll make a way back into relationship. It's amazing. He just deferred to us

I'm gonna ask the team to come back because this has been an interesting kind of good talk. I hope I've helped you understand so that you can articulate to your friends that that whole wives submit to your husbands is not what it's being turned out to be. It's actually a reflection of the verse before mutual submission, submit to one another.

for that. out of reverence to Christ. And I've asked the team just to sing a song called Jesus at the center. And if appropriate, just listen to the Holy spirit as he speaks to you in this little bit of reflection. And here's what I say. Some of you might want to get out your phone and you might want to take someone and just say, Hey, you know what?

Let's catch up. Let's catch up. And you're going into it, not with who's right and who's wrong. You're going into it with a whole heart of, out of, out of mutual reverence for God, for Christ. How do I put this thing right? How do I serve you? How do I help you? How do I bring the strength to you? Which ties back into last week's forgiveness.

Friends, this is timeless advice for troubled times. And if you can grab it, you'll be glad you did. You'll really be glad you did. And the people around you will be glad you did as well.

And God's not asking you to do anything that he hasn't already done for you. Mutual submission. I can scarcely get my head around it, but the creator of the heavens and the earth, I know what I was like, would sacrifice for me. I have, I cannot get my head around it. But I know that He did. And so all I did was I just surrendered my life to Him and said, You know what?

I've made a complete mess of this thing. If you want it, you got it. You can do something with it. And sometimes now I just, of an evening, just kind of reflect and go, Oh my goodness, I cannot believe what you're doing through someone like me. And He can do it through you as well. You just got to stop trying to fix yourself.

Let it go. Say, Jesus, come into my life. Be my Lord. Be my Savior. Be my King. Help me. And it's not something you pray once. It's something that you develop a lifestyle of. Because you start to follow Christ and then He conforms you to the image of Christ. And this particular topic, I just want to say, There are many eyes watching us, little eyes that are watching us, how we conduct relationships.

If we get this right, we set them up to win. If we get this wrong, we set them up to fail. And that is something that we're going to pick up next week in part five. So let's just pray together. Father, I just thank You. Amen. That I know for years when I was a young, when I was a young Christian, this, this verse bugged me, it annoyed me and I never really understood it.

But I thank you that over the years I've learned it and I've understood it and, and I think it's such a freeing thing, Lord, when you understand. This is all just context. You just happen to be talking to marriage people at the time, but it's about just submitting to one another. The way that you submitted to us out of reverence for Christ.

And Lord, if we do this and we get really good at this, we can actually head off some train wrecks in relationships and we can build relationships that will last a lifetime. So Holy Spirit, I pray that you would just speak to us now about who you might have us make contact with. Doesn't matter who's right.

Doesn't matter who's wrong. What matters is who will follow Jesus and submit to the process and put someone else first. So Holy Spirit, just talk to us as the team sings and help us on the journey, we pray. Amen.